My Immortal
- This article is about the Evanescence song. For the Ben Moody version, see My Immortal (Ben Moody).
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General information
Written by: A. Lee, B. Moody and D. Hodges
My Immortal is the fourth track from Evanescence's debut album, Fallen. Amy Lee and Ben Moody co-wrote the song when they were 15, in 1996.[1][2] Ben wrote the lyrics about a fictional story. According to him, the song is about a spirit staying with you after its death and haunting you until you actually wish that the spirit were gone because it won't leave you alone.[3][4] Amy wrote the song's melody, piano and added the bridge,[5][6] and contributed a "little bit" of the lyrics.[7] The song was originally going to be included on Amy and Ben's 1998 EP Evanescence, but it didn't make the cut. Ben said in 2003: "Some of the songs on Fallen are six years old. They've been reworked over the years, but Whisper, Imaginary, My Immortal, those are songs that have been around since Amy and I first started writing music together."[8]
In 2000, they released the demo record Origin, which had a demo of the song. This demo was recorded late at night at the radio station where Amy's father worked because they couldn't afford a "real session."[3] The demo contained a MIDI keyboard and Lee's demo vocal performance as a teen.[9][note 1] Wind-up's A&R Diana Meltzer said that when she heard the song she "knew it was a hit".[10] Wind-up Records forced them to use the demo from Origin on Fallen,[11] and strings were added by Daredevil soundtrack composer Graeme Revell.[12][3] This was the only recording from Origin that Wind-Up used.[13]
In a 2024 interview, Amy said the demo version made Wind-up sign the band.[14] "They were really attached to it and they'd listened to that recording so many times, for years, that by the time we were recording the album, they just couldn't get over the demo."[14] Even though the song was re-recorded in a real studio with strings by David Campbell and Amy's mature voice, the label said, "You know, we really prefer the demo." Amy refuted saying the re-recording should be on the album, but the label replied, "No, there's magic in the demo."[14]
The recording with Revell's strings was included in the Daredevil soundtrack by Wind-up Records, along with "Bring Me to Life".[1] The movie's director, Mark Steven Johnson, picked My Immortal for the funeral scene in the movie.[15][16]
Until near the end of 2002, the Fallen version (only piano) was played live. They then began playing the "band" version (with the rock ending), which later became the version they released as a single. The "band" version was the version Amy and Ben had originally recorded for Fallen with strings arrangements by David Campbell, who Amy wanted to work with and "fought" to have on the album.[17][3] The Mystary EP version is like the demo recording of the "band" version. Amy is playing piano with added strings in the background. Like the Fallen version, this version doesn't include the rock part at the end.
Since Ben wrote the lyrics, Amy said in an interview that it's weird to sing someone else's lyrics, but she learned to reinterpret them and make sense to her.[18] Amy stated that she dislikes the song because "it's just not [her]" and she feels that she's "grown so much now".[11] It's the only song Amy didn't write the lyrics to, so she feels disconnected from it.[7][6]
The song peaked at #2 on the pop chart just behind Britney Spears' "Toxic".[4]
At the end of the Fallen and the "band" versions a beeps code can be heard. This effect was used also at the end of the electronic version of Breathe No More and Give Unto Me. This code was believed to be a morse code, but it turned out to be a false information; this is what Ben explained about it:
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It's actually a preset pattern on a keyboard synthesizer that we were using on that song. And if you sustain the note long enough, it trails off into this beeping that sounds a lot like Morse Code and we thought that it sounded really cool, so we left it. So it's there by accident, to be perfectly honest with you.[19] | 
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My Immortal was confirmed to be re-recorded and included on the orchestral album, Synthesis, when the track list was revealed through the album's pre-order on September 15, 2017. This version was performed live for the first time on October 14, 2017 at the Pearl Concert Theater in Las Vegas, Nevada for the Synthesis Live tour. Watch a performance of the song here. In a 2017 interview, Amy noted that My Immortal is not her favourite song and almost didn't make it to Synthesis.[20] She stated:
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I seriously considered not putting it on the album, but it’s this really cool opportunity to do it again. The version that I hear 99.9 percent of the time, I’m in a grocery store and it comes on, is this old demo that I cannot stand. It’s not even a real piano and it’s me singing late at night at my dad’s work where they had a studio and he let us go in there and record and I was in high school. So part of me just wanted to rerecord it and it was just too good of an opportunity to put a new version with David Campbell’s beautiful arrangement at the top of the pile. But that song I’ve never really felt close to. It was written a really long time ago, but now it’s become this big part of our history between our fans and me and I think about the song and the way it makes me feel now. It’s about them, it’s about my relationship with our fans over the years.[21] |
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When asked which Evanescence song that she got bored of in an interview in December 2020, Amy replied My Immortal:
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I went through a phase where I considered never playing it again because I'm so sick of it. It's hard to have your sound wrapped up into one song, but in general artists are known for one song above the others and for us that's either 'Bring Me To Life' or 'My Immortal'. Both of them have something that doesn't sum up our band right, 'Bring Me To Life' has the rap, but 'My Immortal' is the one Evanescence song that I didn't write the lyrics to. It's precious and from this formative time where we were learning how to make music, but our old guitar player wrote the words and I've never liked them. You tend to love something that you pour your real self and heart into more, so it was never my favourite.[22] |
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In a 2023 interview, Amy said the song "didn’t mean a lot to me in the beginning. That was a song I got sick of. There were a couple of years where I was like, ‘I’m not playing the song tonight. I don’t want to. I’m tired of it.'"[6] However, she performs it every night before the last song in the set list in a moment where she thanks the fans. Although it doesn't resonate with her as the lyrics were written by Ben, she said: "I really sing the words to the fans. It really means something to me now that it couldn’t have meant then because they weren’t there. It feels like it was always about that now."[6]
In a Kerrang! cover story about the 20th anniversary of Fallen, Amy discussed how the song came about and the inclusion of a strings version on the remaster reissue:
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“Ben played a droning note thing on the piano and it was really beautiful. It wasn’t completely finished, but it was the song. I was like, ‘Let me take this, think about it, and make a real piano part.’ When I was 15, I lived in a house with my parents and there was my grandparents’ old piano in the garage. I worked really hard, arranged the part, and then realised later it was in the wrong key. The piano was way out of tune, but we liked it. Still to this day, when we play it live, I do it the way that I wrote it in the garage. I wasn’t crazy about the label putting the demo version on Fallen. The official version in my head is the band version we did in the studio at that time, the one David Campbell wrote strings to. Whether the band comes in or not, that’s the version. I only realised a few years ago that we didn’t have a version out in the world where the band just doesn’t come in where it’s the studio version, so I made it and we put that on the deluxe!”[23] |
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Versions
Studio versions:
My Immortal [Fallen version]
- Recording date: 1999, 2002 (Strings)
- Status: Released
- Released on:
- Fallen (track #4) – the third single off the album
- Daredevil: The Album (track #17)
- most of "My Immortal" single editions
- Length: 4:24
My Immortal [Mystary version]
- Recording date: 2001–2002
- Status: Released
- Released on: Mystary EP (track #2)
- Length: 4:40
My Immortal [Band version]
- Recording date: August - November 2002
- Status: Released
- Released on:
- Re-release of Fallen (track #12, track #13 on Japanese editions)
- All of the "My Immortal" single editions and numerous compilation CDs
- Length: 4:36
My Immortal [Band version (Guitars down)][note 2]
- Recording date: August - November 2002
- Status: Released
- Released on: "My Immortal" UK CD 2 single and most of the promotional singles
- Length: 4:36
My Immortal [Band version (No strings)][note 3]
- Recording date: August - November 2002
- Status: Released
- Released on: Most of the "My Immortal" promotional singles
- Length: 4:36
My Immortal [Strings Version / Remastered][note 4]
- Recording date: 2002
- Status: Released
- Released on: Fallen (Deluxe Edition / Remastered) (track #16)
- Length: 4:34
My Immortal [Origin version]
- Recording date: 1999
- Status: Released
- Released on: Origin (track #4)
- Length: 4:26
My Immortal [Evanescence EP outtake]
- Recording date: 1998
- Status: Unreleased
- Length: 5:20
My Immortal [Synthesis version]
- Recording date: May - August 2017
- Status: Released
- Released on: Synthesis (track #14)
- Length: 4:25
Live versions:
My Immortal [2000–2004 Live]
- Performing period: 2000 - August 14, 2004
- Status: Released
- Recording date: October 17, 2003 ("My Immortal" single), May 25, 2004 (Anywhere but Home)
- Released on:
- "My Immortal" single
- Anywhere but Home (track #9)
- Length: 4:15 ("My Immortal" single), 4:38 (Anywhere but Home)
My Immortal [2006–2007 Live]
- Performing period: October 5, 2006 - December 8, 2007
- Example: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, ON, Canada (January 8, 2007)[24]
My Immortal [2009 Live]
- Performing Period: November 4, November 8, 2009
- Performed at: New York City secret gig (November 4)[25] and Maquinaria Festival, São Paulo, Brazil (November 8)
My Immortal [2011–2012 Live]
- Performing Period: August 17, 2011 - November 9, 2012
- Example: Hollywood Palladium, Hollywood, California, USA (October 11, 2011)[26]
My Immortal [2016 Live]
- Performing Period: October - November 2016
- Example: The Diamond Ballroom, Oklahoma City, OK (October 30th, 2016)
My Immortal [2017 Live]
- Performing Period: April 2017
- Example: Arenele Romane, Bucharest, Romania (June 29th, 2017)
My Immortal [Synthesis Live]
- Performing period: October 14, 2017 - September 8, 2018
- Status: Released
- Recording date: November 3, 2017
- Released on: Synthesis Live (track #14)
- Length: 4:47
My Immortal [Acoustic]
- Performing period: 2003; December 7, 2011; November 2015; April - May 2016
- Status: Released
- Released on:
- "Bring Me to Life" UK DVD single (track #4)
- "My Immortal" German (Pock-It!®) single (track #2)
- "Lost in Paradise" digital single (track #3)
- Length: 4:29
My Immortal [Live at O2 Arena, London / November 14, 2022 / Remastered]
- Status: Released on November 3, 2023
- Released on: Fallen (Deluxe Edition / Remastered) (track #21)
- Recording date: November 14, 2022
- Recording place: The O2 Arena, London, England
- Length: 4:50
Download
Lyrics
Fallen, Origin, Mystary, acoustic and band versions
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
Evanescence EP outtake
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
I would give the very breath from my chest
To give you all the things that my mind couldn't bear
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
I'd love to walk away and pull myself out of the rain
But I can't leave without you
I'd love to live without the constant fear and endless doubt
But I can't live without you
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
Video
The video for "My Immortal" was shot in Barcelona (the fountain in the video is a tourist stop for many fans) and played in black-and-white. Throughout the video, Lee is never seen touching the ground because she is a ghost.[27] It was released on November 9, 2003.[28]
In an interview with Rock Sound magazine, Lee commented on the video's concept:[29]
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You know what? When you see the video it's really amazing. Obviously we filmed it before this [Ben Moody's departure] happened and it's amazing irony, how much it makes sense. We're all separated and wandering the streets looking like it's the day after a funeral, with Ben in a suit and bare feet, and I'm never touching the ground. I'm sitting on a phone booth or lying on a car, to hint that I'm dead, that I'm singing from the dead. It's all about separation. It's almost like the director knew what was going to happen, but he can't have known. It's just one of those fate things. |
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The video was filmed 2 weeks before Ben Moody left the band.[3]
In a comment on EvBoard, Amy said that her hair in the video is very similar to the way her hair is naturally (she straightens it normally).[30]
- Watch the video on YouTube.com
Commercial release
Main article: My Immortal Single
The "My Immortal" single was released on December 8, 2003.
Tracks released with this single include:
- "My Immortal" [Band version]
- "My Immortal" [Live from Cologne]
- "Haunted" [Live from Sessions@AOL]
- "My Immortal" [Video]
- "My Immortal" [Video - Behind the Scenes]
- "My Immortal" [Band version (No strings)]
- "My Immortal" [Band version (Guitars down)]
- "My Immortal" [Fallen version]
- "My Immortal" [Live acoustic]
Guitar tabs & sheet music
- Piano sheet music (Live version) - arranged by Nolan
- Piano sheet music (Album version) - arranged by Yi Su
- Piano sheet music (Piano/vocal version - 1998 demos) - arranged by Kyle Marcolini
- Piano sheet music (real)
Notes
- ↑ Amy said she wasn't allowed to be a "piano player" on Fallen, though she wrote the arrangements. David is credited on the album's liner notes for piano/keyboards. [1][2][3][4]
- ↑ This version is the exact same as the band version; however, the guitar track toward the climax of the song is muted by about half. This was rumored to be used on radio stations where a heavy guitar track would be inappropriate.
- ↑ This version was rumored to be used on harder rock radio stations where a major string arrangement would be inappropriate. There are strings on the track, but they don't appear until after the guitar section of the song.
- ↑ This is the same version as the band version, but the band doesn't come in after the bridge.
References
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 "Interview with DC101 radio on February 24, 2003". Elliot in the Morning. February 24, 2003. http://evanescencereference.info/music/Evanescence-DC101%20Interview%202.mp3.
- ↑ "Evanescence’s Future Uncertain, Says Amy Lee: ‘I Have a Lot More That I Want To Do With My Life’". Billboard. September 22, 2014.
- ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 3.3 3.4 Wiederhorn, Jon (November 5, 2003). "Are There Clues To Evanescence's Problems In Their New Video?". MTV News. Archived from the original on February 21, 2014. https://web.archive.org/web/20140221191651/https://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1480210/evanescence-release-my-immortal-clip.jhtml. Retrieved May 15, 2013.
- ↑ 4.0 4.1 "Pop Songs: March 27, 2004". Billboard. Archived from the original on December 9, 2013. http://web.archive.org/web/20131209141406/http://www.billboard.com/charts/2004-03-27/pop-songs. Retrieved October 29, 2013.
- ↑ Lee, Amy (August 3, 2005). "Haunted Written Lyrics". Archived from the original on September 18, 2023. https://ghostarchive.org/archive/lRt1m.
- ↑ 6.0 6.1 6.2 6.3 Houghton, Cillea (September 20, 2022). "Why Evanescence’s Amy Lee Has a Newfound Respect For “My Immortal”". American Songwriter. https://americansongwriter.com/why-evanescences-amy-lee-has-a-newfound-respect-for-my-immortal/.
- ↑ 7.0 7.1 Enos, Morgan (October 21, 2021). "Evanescence's Amy Lee On Her Upcoming Tour With Halestorm, Friendship With Lzzy Hale & How She Feels About "My Immortal" Today". Grammy. https://web.archive.org/web/20211025150214/https://www.grammy.com/grammys/news/evanescence-amy-lee-interview-halestorm-lzzy-hale-tour-co-headlining-the-bitter-truth-my-immortal.
- ↑ Gargano, Paul (August 2003). "Evanescence Brought to Life". Metal Edge 49 (4): 18.
- ↑ Law, Sam (October 2017). "Symphonic Possession". Kerrang! (1694): 27. ISSN 0262-6624. https://evthreads.proboards.com/thread/2472/symphonic-possession-kerrang-issue-1694.
- ↑ "Interview with DIANA MELTZER, A&R; at Wind-up Records for Creed, Evanescence". Hit Quarters. July 7, 2003.
- ↑ 11.0 11.1 Cashmere, Paul (April 6, 2004). "Amy Lee Hates Evanescence My Immortal". Undercover News. Archived from the original on September 27, 2006. http://web.archive.org/web/20060927193500/http://www.undercover.com.au/news/2004/apr04/20040406_evanescence.html. Retrieved May 15, 2013.
- ↑ Reeseman, Bryan (August 1, 2003). "In The Recording Studio With Evanescence: Recording Fallen". Mix. Archived from the original on July 9, 2008. https://web.archive.org/web/20080709040742/http://mixonline.com/recording/interviews/audio_evanescence_enduring_sound/. Retrieved July 11, 2013.
- ↑ Email from December 20, 2012 between AeternusAmatorius and a source who claimed to be close to the band during the 1995 to 2001 eras
- ↑ 14.0 14.1 14.2 "Evanescence discusses Fallen, 20 Years of Truth, and the Struggle for Women in Rock". Rolling Stoen Japan. January 19, 2024. https://rollingstonejapan.com/articles/detail/40455/2/1/1.
- ↑ Perrone, Pierre (2003). "Evanescence: Vanishing Point". Rock Sound: 38. https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=10155259858190739&set=a.10155259759920739.
- ↑ Harrington, Richard (September 12, 2003). "Evanescence: Rock's New Dynamic Duo". The Washington Post. https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/lifestyle/2003/09/12/evanescence-rocks-new-dynamic-duo/e4a4887e-c89c-48b9-8fc4-061e1d44657b/.
- ↑ "Amy Lee tells the real story behind Evanescence's 'Bring Me to Life'". Dazed Digital. September 1, 2022. https://web.archive.org/web/20220927023618/https://www.dazeddigital.com/music/article/56815/1/amy-lee-tells-the-real-story-behind-evanescences-bring-me-to-life.
- ↑ Campagna, Cathy A. (February 2004). "Evanescence: New Royalty". Metal Edge 49: 22-23. Archived from the original on January 16, 2014. http://web.archive.org/web/20140116211147/http://www.evanescencewebsite.com/Fallen/displayimage.php?album=167&pos=13.
- ↑ Desens, Krista (August 6, 2004). "Cracking the 'My Immortal' Code". Net Music Countdown. Archived from the original on May 1, 2005. https://web.archive.org/web/20050501071956/http://netmusiccountdown.com/inc/news_article.php?id=6106. Retrieved July 4, 2010.
- ↑ Adams, Cameron (October 3, 2017). "Evanescence have removed the “compromise” rap from biggest hit". news.com.au. https://www.news.com.au/entertainment/music/evanescence-have-removed-the-compromise-rap-from-biggest-hit/news-story/28af28890025b883b06cfad6675259c8.
- ↑ Baltin, Steve (November 13, 2017). "Evanescence Amy Lee Talks Orchestral Shows: 'I Think This Is Just A Really Cool Moment In Time'". Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/stevebaltin/2017/11/13/evanescence-amy-lee-talks-orchestral-shows-i-think-this-is-just-a-really-cool-moment-in-time/#dd1206775577.
- ↑ Howell, Maddy (December 2020). "The First... Amy Lee". Rock Sound (272): 63. ISSN 1465-0185. https://evthreads.proboards.com/thread/2877/interview-rock-sound-december-2020.
- ↑ Garner, George (November 15, 2023). "Evanescence: “I’m so grateful for Fallen. It is something bigger than me”". Kerrang!. https://www.kerrang.com/evanescence-fallen-amy-lee-bring-me-to-life-going-under-my-immortal-interview-anniversary-cover-story.
- ↑ "ACC, Toronto - January 8, 2007". Jam!. January 9, 2007. http://jam.canoe.ca/Music/Artists/E/Evanescence/ConcertReviews/2007/01/09/3255749.html. Retrieved October 29, 2013.
- ↑ Harris, Chris (November 5, 2009). "Evanescence Return to the Stage at 'Secret' New York Gig". Rolling Stone. http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/evanescence-return-to-the-stage-at-secret-new-york-gig-20091105. Retrieved October 29, 2013.
- ↑ Schillaci, Sophie (October 12, 2011). "Evanescence at the Palladium: Concert Review". The Hollywood Reporter. http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/review/evanescence-taylor-momsen-concert-review-247487. Retrieved October 29, 2013.
- ↑ Lee, Amy (October 13, 2004). "Letter to Amy from my 11-year-old cousin". EvBoard. Archived from the original on June 6, 2016. http://web.archive.org/web/20160606043420/http://www.evboard.com/562590-post39.html. Retrieved October 29, 2013.
- ↑ https://blabbermouth.net/news/evanescence-my-immortal-video-posted-online
- ↑ Baker, Trevor (2003). "Evanescence: The Leaving Song". Rock Sound: 28. https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=10155259857375739&set=a.10155259759920739.
- ↑ Amy's EvBoard post on October 12, 2004: "okay, I can't believe I'm being the expert hair consultant here, but I just can't believe you guys really think I have straight hair! My natural hair is like in the my immortal video. I know how frustrating it is to get your hair really really straight, and I'm kindof obsessed with japanese fashion"
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